Module 4.3 – All

Module 4.3 - Speak Opportunities More Than Challenges

What do you think? Are you one who looks more at possibilities or challenges? Keep a log of the input you take in for a few days. Find a way to make a list of what you read, listen to in the car, watch on TV or your devices, read on social media, etc. and rate each one as “positive” or “negative.” Tally the amount of each category. Journal about whether you tend to input positive or negative material. Assess the impact this has on your life and well-being. Does the input raise you up or take you lower? Is it “renewing your mind?” Think about any adjustment you might decide to make.

Name: Jill West

I'm going to start with the disappointment part so I can end on a more positive note lol

My disappointment morphed from being disappointed in the organizations I worked for to a somber acceptance that, although I love the spirit of capitalism, in practice is it shit. I've often wondered if American capitalism is too far gone for any business to succeed with integrity. When Brene Brown started a company with the purpose of changing the way business is done, I started to have hope for the future. I still figured it didn't include me, though. I wonder sometimes if I'm the fruit of the poisonous tree in business. Am I tainted because I haven't had the experience of working in an organization that was run with integrity? Is firsthand knowledge of how and why they went wrong enough to help build businesses that go right?

I felt like, if I had done my job correctly, none of those companies would need further help. But I realize that, because of the nature of human beings, every organization needs periodic checks and balances done by an outside source. I was talking to a client the other day about his desire to get into solutions architecture. I explained that IT is completely different than HR. You can solve computer issues and the systems will continue to run the way they were designed for eternity. It doesn't work that way with people. You can "fix" toxicity in an organization for the moment, but without constant reassessments, it's almost a guarantee that they will need future help. Understanding the nature of human beings helps in understanding why businesses are like toddlers - if you take your eyes off of them, they're sticking their fingers into outlets and drinking bleach.

We aren't really taught how to get along in society. We are taught to share when we're very young but most kids (and adults) still do it begrudgingly. How are we taught this lesson? If we don't share, we get into trouble. We learn to do it because the adults tell us to do it. It would take too much time and effort to show the actual cause and effect relationship between sharing and being endearing to people who want to play with you.

"If you share with little Johnny, he will enjoy playing with you and he will share his cool toys with you, too!" is better than:

"If you don't share your toys, you are in time-out and nobody will want to be your friend!"

One builds cooperative relationships where both people feel valued and wanted (Johnny likes having me around, I am a valuable friend); the other builds transactional relationships where both people try to "outsmart" authority and manipulate each other (I need to pretend that I want to share so I can get what I want and not get into trouble).

Since finding an adult who was taught this way is only slightly easier than finding a unicorn in your backyard, we need to understand that we are often dealing with decades of fuckery in each individual person in an organization. You can't undo the fuckery in one meeting anymore than you can "cure" someone's mental health struggles with a pill or one session with a therapist.

My vision is to be someone who is an asset to companies who understand that prevention and routine maintenance are better than waiting until your engine blows. I have the knowledge and experience but I've found that companies don't want to deal with things that aren't a problem yet or they want to micromanage the way problems are addressed. The most popular one is: "My company is struggling with a toxic environment and we've planned a bonding retreat. Can you come and help us babysit these adults who can't play nicely together during the retreat?"

Try being on a cruise ship and panicking every time someone says "Have you seen Karen?"

I honestly didn't intend to write most of that but I was inspired by my hummingbird feeder. Apparently, I made really good sugar water this time because there are four of them that have been fighting over it since I put it up. There are four little areas where they can feed but none of them want to play nicely. They are going at each other like little fighter jets and using all of their precious energy to fight over this damn feeder. I have my office set up as a perfect viewing area and it isn't usually this toxic.

It occured to me that many companies have hummingbirds, rather than bees. Bees cooperate and create magic that enriches the world; hummingbirds argue and create nothing but entertainment for those watching. Sorry, my journal today has become a creative session on developing my vision. I'm not sure if I hit the spirit of your questions but I feel like I wrote some pretty profound shit that I will use. I need to order more hummingbird feeders because they're going to kill each other lol

What do you think? Are you one who looks more at possibilities or challenges? Keep a log of the input you take in for a few days. Find a way to make a list of what you read, listen to in the car, watch on TV or your devices, read on social media, etc. and rate each one as “positive” or “negative.” Tally the amount of each category. Journal about whether you tend to input positive or negative material. Assess the impact this has on your life and well-being. Does the input raise you up or take you lower? Is it “renewing your mind?” Think about any adjustment you might decide to make.

Name: Micah Ruiz Esparza

Focusing on opportunities vs being denial is tough. You asked us to give some honest feedback on our thoughts from this lesson and here are some of mine. I think it is absolutely necessary to look forward and be able to move past your current circumstance. It is very important to not let failure hold you back from moving forward. At the same time, I think there is an important step between that I struggle with, and I think this was reinforced in all of my church environments and that is being present to the current moment and fully experiencing it. We absolutely must keep moving, but we also need to be present. And honestly, I struggle with just being present with my thoughts, feelings, and emotions because I was taught to really keep pressing so much forward that I can miss the full enjoyment of moments. Or move on so quickly that I don't even process it. (just a side note suggestion, if you were to change this module, I think for the most part it's really good but maybe could spend more time on how to be present in the moment.)

When a vision is failing, a team needs to trust the leader to change directions. A lot of people are averse to change. For the leader to come and change a whole situation might come with opposition even if the vision is failing.

I am a songwriter. I would love to be recognized as a good songwriter as I really start to pursue that passion. I want to push the boundaries of music and create something beautiful and moving. Some of the challenges are financial. I can't afford a studio or all of the fancy equipment. But what I am finding is that even some of the best artists use obscure methods to create their sounds even from seemingly cheap or crappy equipment. They can afford better but intentionally do this! That gives me hope that my artistry is not dependent on my equipment (though certain ones will be necessary), but it is dependent on my own creativity and developing my craft. As I continue, I can pursue how I can do the best with what I have. No one will be asking what equipment or microphones I used, they will just like my music or not. And even for my own self, I must choose not to overthink it. I can be satisfied with what I can create now and still love it. And I can still release it knowing I will continue to get better.

I have always been an optimist, so I often ignore negative moments. Sometimes that means my vision is put on hold so I don't have to deal with it. It is a vulnerable thing to share music. It feels like it is a part of me and an extension of myself. For someone to reject it feels like they are rejecting me. But I have over time had to learn to start to let that go and see that my music is not me. I am more than my music. Everyone has their own preferences and I can respect that.

I have always been one to tackle hurdles. I think sometimes it's just getting started on taking the leap that is hard. Sometimes it just seems like a lot of work. But once I get started, I always find a way to make it over.

What do you think? Are you one who looks more at possibilities or challenges? Keep a log of the input you take in for a few days. Find a way to make a list of what you read, listen to in the car, watch on TV or your devices, read on social media, etc. and rate each one as “positive” or “negative.” Tally the amount of each category. Journal about whether you tend to input positive or negative material. Assess the impact this has on your life and well-being. Does the input raise you up or take you lower? Is it “renewing your mind?” Think about any adjustment you might decide to make.

Name: Jill West

Sometimes I worry that my positive outlook is closer to denial. I try to self assess to see if I’m being positive because I don’t want to adequately prepare for something with a potentially negative outcome - like if I was going to court and didn’t prepare an argument, but just said “it’ll work out” to escape the stress of preparation under the veil of positivity. That’s just an example, not an actual experience.

I am no longer much of a leader professionally, and I do miss it. I am a leader in my family and I am trying to nurture and support leadership skills in my own children. I’ve always felt like my strength was in training others to lead. I’ve trained people who have become great leaders themselves. I also believe that I have more of an obligation to my family than to my profession. Even beyond my children, I try to mentor other family members and friends and help them find their voices of leadership in their own families.

I’ve seen way too many families stumbling due to a lack of leadership. My own family was one of them. I was too focused on work to properly lead my family when my kids were young. I regret not seeing it then, but I try to be better now. Families often work the same way as businesses do and lack of leadership destroys both.

A goal I am pressing towards is writing a book. The steps to get there will include being courageous enough to really share my work with friends first and then strangers. I have a crappy little blog that I put up last year but I didn’t really share it with anyone. It was kind of like practice for me to get used to putting things out into the universe.

My struggle is with confidence and courage. I fight the “not good enough” messages and sometimes tell myself that people with way more clout and experience than I have are writing so why would anyone listen to me? I didn't complete a formal education in the areas I write about. Nobody will listen to me because my expertise is from my own personal experience, my multiple "half degrees" and my own independent research. I have no letters after my name.

The disappointments in my past are the messages from my mother and the fact that I didn’t finish college. I wasn’t “allowed” to go for journalism so I changed majors several times and eventually left because I was able to make good money working in an industry I grew up in. Nothing ever sparked a passion in me in college. I started in sports management, went to pre-med (to please my mother) then switched to business, accounting and finally, marketing.

My mother still TO THIS DAY shames me for my lack of a degree and that’s why I shame myself. Honestly, it's only ever been mentioned once in my professional career and the guy who mentioned it was looking for a reason to be an asshole (he was also a drug addict who sexually exploited young male employees).

What do you think? Are you one who looks more at possibilities or challenges? Keep a log of the input you take in for a few days. Find a way to make a list of what you read, listen to in the car, watch on TV or your devices, read on social media, etc. and rate each one as “positive” or “negative.” Tally the amount of each category. Journal about whether you tend to input positive or negative material. Assess the impact this has on your life and well-being. Does the input raise you up or take you lower? Is it “renewing your mind?” Think about any adjustment you might decide to make.

Name: inpower testing

testing journal for mod4 pt3 @127

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